Filed under “this can’t happen here … I hope”: A vicious Muscovy duck somehow got loose in a Cape Coral, Florida neighborhood, and went on an angry tear, according to People.com. 

James Sepulveda was sitting on his porch with his eyes closed, and the duck snuck up and bit him on the hand. Hard. The duck bit another man, too. Other people, including a reporter, were chased and harassed by the duck, who also lurked around people’s front doors, and hid, waiting to attack. 

The residents’ hands were tied, as Muscovy ducks are a protected species, so they were stuck with him. Their misery soon spread all over social media and, according to Fox 35, happily “Jimmy,” was captured by Mark Quadrozzi of Remarkable Rescues, and taken to live with other equally disgruntled and disagreeable ducks. (Screenshot: FOX 4 Now/Facebook)