The North Coast hosted Kindergarten Cop and The Goonies. Now it’s Invasion of the River-Snatchers. They came from Houston, and they want the Columbia.

Will they take our river, our resources, our air and water and our fish and wildlife habitat? Don’t let them trample on our peace of mind, our safety and security, our economy, our land use rules. Stop them from crushing our future.

Would Hollywood buy a script this outrageous? NorthernStar’s scary scenario includes liquefied natural gas tankers escorted by armed gunboats on the river four to six days each week; much of Astoria and Warrenton in the dreaded 1.55 mile tanker vapor hazard zone; and 86 to 129 million gallons of gas stored on land that is at risk for a subduction earthquake.

NorthernStar’s testimony was definitely creative at the county planning commission hearing in July about its proposed LNG terminal at Bradwood. It contained the contradictory information, empty promises, and half-truths you’d expect in a really bad movie. Here are examples taken from NorthernStar’s testimony:

1) Sixty-five jobs? Not really. Only 35, plus 30 contracted out to somebody somewhere.

2) An Industrial Fire Brigade ready to supplement local emergency resources? Not really. NorthernStar admitted the IFB is not a separate unit always on standby, but workers who will be at other jobs at the terminal. NorthernStar said we can plan to have fires during shift change or use their equipment in an emergency. Maybe they’ll leave us a spare set of fire truck keys at Knappa Market.

3) Local support? Not really. Only a handful of local people spoke at the hearing in favor of the Bradwood site. Most of the proposal’s supporters were out-of-town union members. Maybe they’re the ones needing jobs. Many area residents had to skip the hearing because they were at work.

4) Two tanks or three? Who knows? NorthernStar applied for three storage tanks with the county, but some of their numbers relate to two tanks, not three.

5) The gas is for the Pacific Northwest? Well, tankers will bring in double what Oregon needs, and NorthernStar admitted it can’t control where the gas goes. They say they’re merely talking about a pipeline linking Bradwood to California. Does NorthernStar consider California part of the Pacific Northwest?

Will our elected officials let this horror story happen? Hundreds of people have been working to stop NorthernStar and its proposed LNG terminal at Bradwood. It’s up to us to convince our elected leaders to stop this project. Contact them through http://capwiz.com/thehill

Tell them to stop this “Nightmare on the Columbia.”

Laurie Caplan

Astoria