They just shrugged their shoulders and left! I am burning up inside. George thought he would be nice to a newcomer in our neighborhood, and save some money to boot by having an electrician whose name is not in the phone book wire our upstairs. I absolutely hate having friends of friends working for me! They always seem just different enough to make me uneasy and I want to look over their shoulder. Just looking, I would tell them, but actually I was looking for trouble spots, a door that doesn’t close right, or maybe a rug with the jag where a jig should have been cut. I figure if they were as good as they say, they would be licensed, bonded and in the telephone book.

This friend of a son of a worker at the shop had just moved here from out-of-state and needed some money. Thirty-five dollars an hour he said. When I saw this runt of a man, with pants that hung down way past an exposed belly button, I didn’t want him to cross my threshold, leave alone wire my upstairs. In fact, I wanted to call the city hall and warn them about this new man in town! Stupid, unverified, suspicious, yes, all those and more!

I’m not in the habit of going against my husband’s decision, and anyway, hadn’t George known his brother who ad this friend who had a friend for years? The fact that he probably hadn’t graduated from high school, nor had a license to touch a wire in my house didn’t faze George one bit! “Come over and start right soon now, you hear!” George called.

We stayed home from Elks Monday night because the electrician was coming after work. I asked George if he know where he lived, like a telephone number? Someplace in town was all he knew. He didn’t call, and he didn’t come! Tuesday was Ladies Night Out at the churc, but George thought better of me going, because the electrician might need me to tell him where a plug goes. Baloney —-, he had the architect’s drawing, didn’t he? George called him, and “Oh, righty now, be over this evening after I clean up!” He sounded so sweet on the speaker phone, I had visions of him coming over in a tuxedo with roses in hand. He didn’t. Saturday, George heard our electrician was doing some work at the school. He was. George found him by moving some floorboards around and discovering a sandal with a foot in it beside a wire poking through a hole. “Be done here mightly soon, Pal, mighty soon, and be right over and make your little woman happy!” I could have pelted that electrician with bee-bee shot if I could have caught him under or on top of a floorboard! Make me happy, huh?

Another week, no show, no phone calls. We stayed home every darn night, even put off hot-tubing because we didn’t want him to catch us skinny dipping. I called Electric City, our usual electrician. My favorite lady, Julie, called back early the next morning asking what she could do for us, what we needed wired. By then George was forgiving the friend of a friend and wanted to keep him – since we had a verbal contact with him. Called Julie back and canceled.

He didn’t come Saturday, even though he had called and said he would be there on the dot. I asked George which ‘dot’ he had in mind. No show.

“Stay home from church, Honey, he might come since it’s a day off.” I snuggled under the covers just as I heard George dialing the brother’s number. “Nine? That will be fine. Annie will have the dogs put up.”

“Nine it is. Golly, but I gotta pick up my daughter and my helper, but I’ll be there by nine, you betcha, Nine!”

He came at 11:30. I had missed church, eaten a whole cantaloupe and drank three cups of coffee. Finally let the dogs out. He came with another guy who looked like he just got out of bed ans was having trouble getting his pants fastened, since they weren’t. Dum-dum bit the electrician just as he came through the gate. “Bad Boy,” I admonished, but not with too much enthusiasm. My dog could have another bite for all I cared. I didn’t ‘howdy, or you all make yourselves busy now’ nor nothing, just walked back up the steps while thy shuffled along behind. We all three stopped at the door, almost heel to tow. I looked up at the clock and said, in my best Queen of England voice, “It is eleven thirty!”

“Well you know rightly it is. Now where is that room you need to be made all electrified?” I showed them the stairs, pulled the dog off his pant legs and wondered what I would hear next. Didn’t take long to find out.

“Lady, you been up there? You see here, we electricians need room to get around your attic, and there’s none, so we be gone. Call us when it’s done right by, and we’ll be here on the dot!”