There has been a gaping dearth of qualified burger news on this site, which is my fault. I have the information, but have neglected to share it in hopes I get out and try these prodigious patties of bovine splendor first.

Here is the scoop from my most knowledgeable, favorite source of burger news …

In Dallas, Texas that is: USA Today says it’s Wingfield’s “Lord of the Ground Round.” My burger spy says, “bars on the window are always a good sign for a restaurant. Window bars=bad neighborhood, great food!”

He notes he used to get ribs at a joint in Milwaukee (not Milwaukie) “where you slid your money through a hole in bullet-proof glass and they slid the pork back out.” He theorizes that maybe you could get other non-meat substances at this place (not legal) and maybe that’s what made the ribs so durn good.

This patty sleuth also points to a July 2006 Consumer Reports which lists The Capital Grille Burger as Excellent and Ruby Tuesday, Outback and Hard Rock burgers as Very Good. All of which cost $7 or more. Since none of those reside in Clatsop County, I’m thinking it’s the Relief Pitcher for all of us.

This is a one-source commentary on the state of beef between buns, so if you have thoughts on burgers – either home or on the road – or any other culinary fare, please either respond in the Article Comment area below or send it to laura@seaside-sun.com. Happy eating!